A Day in the Life of our Neurodivergent Family

As a neurodivergent family, we learn as we go.

I’ve worked with many kids, I was a nursery teacher and nanny, but parenting my own? Whole different level.

Especially when neurodivergence is in the picture.

Unless you’re dealing with a neurotypical child, you can’t just apply what you learned in childcare training and expect it to work. With us, even basic daily tasks become something I need to stick on the wall as reminders... for them and for me.

And let me be real, once it’s been on the wall for a while, we all stop noticing it.

What Actually Works

I still love visual routines. I always recommend them.

But let’s be honest, visuals don’t always work unless we make them engaging again.

One little trick I use is moving the routine chart to a different wall every so often.

It feels like a new thing, so we actually look at it again.

Timers? Visual timers work because they go off. They grab our attention. My Google Calendar and phone reminders are essential. I write down everything.

You don’t need a fancy app, just something that helps your brain out.

As a neurodivergent mum, I’ve become more aware of how my brain works, and instead of fighting it, I’ve learned to support it. That took a lot of trial and error.

Now, I have systems that actually work (most days).

When I use a visual planner, it has pictures and no set times, unless I really have to stick to a schedule. For example, lunch might be “sometime between 12 and 1.”

This flexibility helps reduce pressure.

Some days I even forget to switch the pictures on the wall. Guess what? That’s okay too.

What I’m teaching my kids is that tools exist to help us, not to control us. Some days they work, some days they don’t. But we use them anyway, because being predictable makes our day feel safer... and that means fewer meltdowns. More peace. Easier transitions.

Basic Tasks Aren’t Basic

If you’ve got a neurodivergent kid, you know, you can’t just say:

“Go brush your teeth” and expect it to happen.

It’s not that they’re ignoring you. It’s that their brain processes it the same way it would process “climb Mount Everest.”

There’s no distinction between routine and extra and everything is one big task. Every time.

Their brains have to go through each step like it’s brand new.

It’s not laziness, It’s mental overload.

And if you find this hard as a neurodivergent adult (hi, I do), imagine how hard it is for a child...all those feelings and no idea what to do with them.

Here’s what actually gets us through the day:

•  Visual routine (with pics)

• Google Calendar reminders (for literally everything)

• Visual timers (especially when transitioning between tasks)

• “Reset time” (youtube and tv)

• Blanket, plushie, keys (anything becomes a fidget when you need one)

• Flexible schedule instead of rigid hours

• Saying no to things that drain us (yes, even fun things sometimes)

We are not perfect, but here’s the thing… I love our life. I really do.

Even on the hard days, even when the house looks like a soft-play explosion and I’m setting reminders just to breathe.

I wouldn’t trade it.

I look at my kids, and I see them.

I see them knowing themselves, listening to their bodies, learning how to ask for help, how to reset, how to work with their brains, not against them.

That gives me peace.

Because I had to figure all this out after 30, with a lot of trial, error, and unlearning.

But they? They’re already learning how to be themselves in a world that often tells us not to. They’ll grow up equipped, and that means their road won’t be as rocky as mine was.

And that, for me, is everything.

Thank you for reading💛

If this post resonated with you, share it with another parent who might need to hear it too.

You can find me on

Instagram @silvia.london89 or

send me an email at thepracticalparent1@gmail.com 

I always love hearing your thoughts.

You’re doing great. Even on the days it feels like you’re not.